The Carousel of Time

It was hard to believe that yesterday was the first day of spring already, March 21st. Where has the time gone? That means I just finished the last winter of my 40s...well pretty darn close...since my birthday is the first week of January, I'll only have 2 weeks of winter as a 49er in 2007.

It's only the first day of spring and already I'm getting bathing suit brochures from Macy's. Don't they know that I need to enjoy a slow build to the summer? I don't want to rush my 49th year any more than I have to. I want it to progress very slowly...can I say that again...I want it to progress very, very slowly. Not that I can wear those bikinis any way. There was a time that I did wear bikinis...I had a favorite bright striped Rose Marie Reed bikini when I was about 16...was that really 33 years ago...where has the time gone?

As I get older I feel like time is speeding by...is that what happens when we get older....things move faster...or is it that we move slower so everything around us feels like it is moving faster? I feel like my daughter just entered college and next year she will be a senior. I feel like I just moved into this house, yet this May it will be nine years we've lived here...or is it 10...I can't remember...and I still have so much more renovation work to do. I feel like my son just entered high school and next year he will be graduating and going off to college...my baby going off to college...how can that be? And as for me...I feel like I just turned 40 and now I'm turning 50. Oh, where has the time gone?

It's like Joni Mitchell sings in her song The Circle Game..."we're captured on a carousel of time"...I loved that song when I was in college...I played it all the time on my record player (remember record players...I still have all my records downstairs in my basement...just cannot part with them)...but I don't think I appreciated the words of this song as much as I do today...as I read the words I can remember all those spring and summers past...the bikinis and the boyfriends...the ice cream cones and the Good Humor bars...the new spring coat and patent leather shoes. Where has the time gone...yes, Joni's words ring true more for me now than yesterday...read the lyrics...can you remember the melody...I can...it brings back memories...and I still love it.

"Yesterday a child came out to wonder
Caught a dragonfly inside a jar
Fearful when the sky was full of thunder
And tearful at the falling of a star
Then the child moved ten times round the seasons
Skated over ten clear frozen streams
Words like, when you're older, must appease him
And promises of someday make his dreams
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

Sixteen springs and sixteen summers gone now
Cartwheels turn to car wheels thru the town
And they tell him,
Take your time, it won't be long now
Till you drag your feet to slow the circles down
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

So the years spin by and now the boy is twenty
Though his dreams have lost some grandeur coming true
There'll be new dreams, maybe better dreams and plenty
Before the last revolving year is through
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game"

Judi