Let's Face It

As Rita Rudner says in this fabulous little book I bought today called "I'm too young to be this darn old"..."I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts till my ears meet."

Well, I didn't have a face-lift today...no radical surgery...but I did give my face a real lift...I went to have a facial...I had stalled long enough...my daughter had given me a gift certificate to the spa back in June...and I finally took the plunge...and it was so wonderful...my four month tension-filled face finally felt relaxed.

As I put on my towel wrap and prepared to slide under the warm covers on the massage table...I knew my 49 year old face was in for a treat...Donna, the facial therapist, put on soothing music and the scent of lavender filled the air...she examined my skin..."not too bad," she said, "but you have some breakout areas near your chin and around your mouth...are you having digestion problems?" she asked. (How could she tell from my face that I had irritable bowel syndrome...it was pure magic...she was a facial magician.)

"You should take acidophilus," she said, "to improve your flora and it will help that breakout area around your mouth and chin." (Imagine...from flora to face...and I thought it was the chocolate brownies I had eaten...or the other sweets I had consumed...when it really is the stress from my stomach that is causing my face to break out...I will have to keep eating my Activa yogurt that's supposed to fix my digestive woes...and then maybe my face will be fixed for good.)

Once Donna finished analyzing my face and dipensing flora advice...she moved on to exfoliate my skin, remove the impurities (as the brochure description said) and massage my face and neck...then there was the customized mask and treatment creams...it was simply divine...yes...my face felt like I was 49 going on 40...not 49 going on 50.

"You should have monthly facials," said Donna, "It will make your skin glow and your makeup will go on more smoothly." That's all I needed and I was sold...when the going gets tough...I'm going to get glowing...I went straight to the register...paid my bill and did something I always say I'm going to do, but never do...I made my next monthly appointment for November...and I'm going to promise my 49 year old self not to cancel it...or not to forget about it either...I'm going to put my facial appointment on my calendar...in big, bold letters..."Let's face it," I said to myself, "this 49 year old face has to keep glowing if it's going to look good when I'm 50."

And maybe next time I might even venture out and try another kind of facial...there are so many to choose from:

-the anti-aging hydration treatment...this is the one I want to try next...it incorporates a collagen veil for moisture & collagen stimulation with a warm paraffin mask appled over it for maximum penetration and hydration (my face could definitely use some stimulation...maybe if it was stimulated the wrinkles would fade away.)

- the lifting, firming and tightening treatment...this one sounds good too...maybe this is the next one I want to try...it's an intense facial that includes a medium retinal resurfacing treatment to soften facial expression lines. (I wonder what my face would look like if my facial expressions were softened?)

- Pumpkin Enzyme Peel...ooh, maybe I'll try this one next...wonder if they put pumpkin on your face...it says that this natural fruit enzyme has a powerful antioxidant and rich source of beta carotene.(I've eaten pumpkin bread and pumpkin pie...but I've never put it on my face...but I'm adventurous in my old age...I'm ready to try it.)

Oh, I think I'll just try them all...there are 12 months in a year...I have plenty of time for more facials.

Judi

When You're Smilin'

My husband smiled at me yesterday...it made my day...and he opened his eyes...that made my day even better...and he squeezed my hand...even if he didn't know what he was doing...I was okay with that...it felt so good to know that even in the smallest way...he knew I was there...there by his side hoping and praying for his speedy recovery. (My Soulmate-June 17)

Good thing he didn't see my smile...I have to improve my smile...maybe for my 50th birthday I'll turn those buttercups into pearly whites...like when I was younger... never did have very good teeth...my front tooth has been capped for the past 30 years...it's ready for a new one...and my other front tooth is discolored as well...I drink too much coffee and tea (but I can't stop my coffee and tea...especially not my favorite Starbucks decaf skim latte grande)...and my upper tooth on the right has a silver filling that is starting to show through.

"What should I do," I said to my dentist at my six month check-up this past week..."should I live with my aging teeth...or should I finally make my smile brighter at 50?"

"Is it our teeth that give away our age?" I thought to myself. I better start thinking more seriously about all this whitening stuff...only six months to go to the 5-0. Should I try the Crest 5 minute whitening treatment(that's about all the time I have right now...but if I can get the process started...maybe it will work...at least temporarily ...except for the capped tooth which does not respond to whitening ingredients...and that is my front tooth...so I may end up with a two-tone smile...nope...that is not a very good idea).

My dentist recommends I get the Zoom Chairside Whitening System first...then follow with two new veneers for my front teeth...and some bonding for the tooth with the silver filling. I didn't ask what this Zoom and Veneer job will cost (will worry about that later)...I have to think about this first...but I'm getting up the courage to move to the next step...and ask to see the $$$$ signs.

My dentist is so nice...so is my dental hygenist...I know they want me to look my best for my 50th birthday...and I was so pleased to hear that my receding gum line is just that...a receding gum line...no periodontal disease...thank you Dr. R...thank you...thank you...that is one thing I didn't want to have to worry about right now...I have enough to worry about.

Then it was time to make my next dental appointment. "Do you want to make your checkup for January 2008...that's about six months from now," said my dental hygenist. "January," I said, "I can't make my six month appointment for January 2008...do you know what January 2008 is...it is my 50th birthday...and I don't know where I will be...I could be someplace fabulous...in some resort or spa in a European city where I've never been before...being at the dentist is definitely not on my list for January 2008...unless it is to get my new teeth and my new smile." "Okay," she said, "I understand...how about December 20, 2007"...it sounded so much better...yes..."December 20th it is," I told her, "and I'll let you know beforehand what I decide about my new teeth and my new smile."

Smiling has definitely been on my mind this week...from the dentist...to the hospital room where my husband will hopefully be smiling again...sometime really soon.

Yes, a smile makes all the difference...as Louis Armstrong sang...

When you're smilin'....keep on smilin'
The whole world smiles with you
And when you're laughin'....keep on laughin'
The sun comes shinin' through

But when you're cryin'.... you bring on the rain
So stop your frownin'....be happy again
Cause when you're smilin'....keep on smilin'
The whole world smiles with you

Judi

My Peri-Part of Life

It's happening to me...it's happening to me...that thing they call peri-menopause...I knew it would catch up with me eventually...and now it's really happening. I haven't had my period in over two months (and I bought several boxes of Tampax and Stayfree maxi-pads because they were on sale...will have to eventually throw them away...maybe this time forever)...this might be a good thing...although then I'll have reached menopause...that shouldn't fully happen until about 52 or 54.

Am I ready for the night sweats that are going to happen soon...and the hot flashes that are going to invade my body...should I go purchase a new freezer and put it in the bedroom...may have to get a portable air conditioner for my office at work too...or stock up on ice cubes during the day...I'll have to buy more pyjamas for when I have my night sweats and have to change clothes at midnight or 1:00 a.m....or maybe after all these years I should switch to nightgowns...they are easier to get on and off...I've never been a nightgown person...but I can change now that I'm approaching 50...it might be time to ditch the pjs and buy some sexy negligees...Victoria Secret here I come.

Better get my 49 year old body ready for this peri-stage of my life...before the full fledge menopause hits.

According to Dr. Barbara Dehn RN MS NP, from the iVillage website, "peri-menopause is the transition stage before a woman’s periods stop completely. There may be wide fluctuations in hormone levels which may lead to irregular periods and intense symptoms such as hot flashes and night sweats. Many women liken this transition to being on a “roller coaster” because symptoms come and go and can vary in their intensity from day to day. The average age that women experience peri-menopause is in the late 40’s to early 50’s."

I never liked roller coasters when I was a kid and still don't...carousels are my favorite ride...I love sitting on the horses and going up and down and round and round...why can't peri-menopause be like a carousel...why does it have to be like a roller coaster...if I do have to prepare myself for this "roller coaster" world maybe I should go to Six Flags...or Universal Studios...or DisneyWorld this summer...maybe that's how I should spend my summer vacation during my 49th summer...go try out some real roller coasters so I'm better prepared for this peri-part of my life.

According to Nurse Dehn, those in peri-menopause can also experience more headaches and more hair on their face, including coarse hair on their chin, and upper lip...and possibly thinning hair on their scalp (I've been experiencing all of these symptoms in increasing amounts...I do peri-plucks quite often on my chin and have increasingly been bleaching my upper lip more frequently...I also try to keep up with my hair coloring and highlights to make the hair on the top of my head look nice and full...no Rograine for me...ooh...even the sound of it makes me shiver).

I'll have to read up more on this peri-stuff...like forgetfulness (I write everything down now...I have markers and pens in every dresser drawer)... and mood swings (I was yelling at my husband this morning...and my son...very stressed...will have to get one of those REBEL WITH A PAUSE buttons from the minnipauz.com website...and wear the button when I'm in one of my peri-moods)...bouts of bloating (yes...some days I do feel like you could pop my stomach like a big balloon)...sudden tears (will keep an extra box of tissues around and be sure to have a travel size pack in my handbag...just in case...wonder if they have a button on minnipauz.com that I can put on when I start crying).

Too much to think about...hope I make it through the next few years...through the peri and pause...then supposedly life gets really good...my libido should kick back in...and life should become a big carousel again...guess for now I'll just have to prepare for the roller coaster years...strap myself in nice and tight...and if it's scary...I can always shed a few peri-tears.

Judi

You Don't Look A Day Over Forty-something

I told a professional colleague I was blogging my way to 50. "I'm capturing my feelings, my thoughts, my ups, my downs," I said to her. "Really," she sounded surprised. "I didn't know you were turning 50, you don't look like you are almost 50, you don't look a day over forty-something." I always liked this colleague, and after reading her email message...I liked her even more...and now...maybe I'll make her one of my good friends.

Do I look like I'm turning 50...I wondered...how does one look when she is turning 50? How do you define one's age in terms of appearance...what is it about a woman that makes her look 49 or 50...what are those visible signs of aging?

- Is it our hands? (No hand modeling for me, not with those wrinkles and veins showing through...my aging hands are a sure sign I'm approaching 50. No wonder I need to constantly cream them with my Bath & Body Works hand cream.)

- Is it our face? (Can't hide those laugh lines anymore or the ones on my forehead...must count and see if there are 50 of them on my face...maybe there are only 40 lines...maybe that's why my colleague - soon to be good friend - doesn't think I'm turning 50. Sometimes I stand in front of the mirror and pull the skin on my forehead to see how I would look if I had a facelift...not that I'm having a facelift...but I pull it anyway.)

- Is it our eyes or those dark circles under our eyes? (Too many dark circles under my eyes lately...just not getting enough sleep...I am forever buying all those under-eye creams to make my eyes more sparkly...not sure if they are working...but maybe they are working...especially if my colleague - absolutely going to be good friend -thinks I look more like 40 than 50 - I use the Olay Regenerist Total Effects Eye Transforming Cream...it says "it gives a radiant glow and fights 7 signs of aging all-around the eye area"...not believing this is really true I also add some Neutrogena concealer just to make sure...no wonder I look more like 40 than 50.)

- Is it our teeth...the stained teeth that say we're almost 50? (I don't like my yellow stained teeth...even if I am into my colors...I'd rather have white teeth...and I don't like my receding gum lines either...I cannot smile the way I used to.....but maybe..maybe they are not as dark as a 50 year old's teeth...my sister had her teeth whitened at 50...maybe that's why she looks younger than me...I have to look into whitening my teeth so I can keep my 40 year old appearance...and must finally fix the cap on my front tooth...yes, it is an imperative if I want to properly whiten my teeth...don't want my colleague - soon to be absolutely, positively inner circle friend - to eventually say, "Judi, I can tell by your teeth that you are now officially looking like the big 5-0."

- Is it our neck...as Nora Ephron writes in her recent book "I Feel Bad About My Neck?" (My neck is out there for all to see all the time...as visible as my face... does it look like a chicken or rooster neck yet...should I wear turtlenecks as Nora says...I do prefer cowl necks...not a fan of turtlenecks...never was and never will be...but with cowls a bit of neck always shows through...will have to find out what exercises I can do to maintain my 40 year old looking neck.)

- Is it our feet that give away our age? (There are calluses on the bottom of my feet and a little one on my pinky toe...I did just get a pedicure... I like the way my feet look...even if they don't fit into heels anymore...I think I can keep my feet looking forty-something...I'll try some more foot creams and I'll treat myself to more pedicures more often...I promise dear colleague and soon to be inner circle friend...I'm writing my next appointment on the calendar right now...well...maybe tomorrow...or next week...okay, I promise I'm going to have pedicures more than twice a year.)

It's not easy trying to maintain my forty-something appearance when I'm almost 50...but who cares...as the famous saying goes...beauty is in the eye of the beholder...think I'll call my professional colleague...soon to be good friend...and see what she thinks.

Judi

Snow on My Eyebrows

Well, I just woke up this morning and found another white hair peeking out from one of my eyebrows. What should I do?

Do I:
a) pluck it out and start to leave an empty space
b) leave it alone and look like there is a white spec on my eyebrow
c) dye my eyebrows, that is probably not easy to do...will have to ask my colorist the next time I see him

This is not the first white eyebrow hair I've found and I don't like it.

When I was a young girl, I remember my Aunt Dorothy. She didn't have any eyebrows. I always wondered why she had a fake line above her eyes where her eyebrows belonged. She would apply her fake eyebrows with a brown eyebrow pencil. My mom said my Aunt Dorothy plucked her eyebrows too much. I wonder if she had too many white hairs in her eyebrows?

InStyle magazine just had an article in their February issue about Brow Gurus...wonder what the Brow Gurus in NYC would say about this situation? I may have to read up on eyebrow tips on glam.com. They seemed to have a lot of tips on the subject.

Guess I'll see what develops during the next few weeks...at least there are no white hairs on top of my head...at least not for now.

Judi

Weighing In

Just yesterday I went to my gynecologist for a follow up appointment. When I arrived, prior to seeing my doctor, the nurse asked me to step on the scale. "What, you want me to get on the scale," I said to the nurse. "No one told me I was going to have to do that this evening, especially when I have all my clothes on and boots too."

Usually when I know I am going to have to weigh in, I wear appropriate "weigh in" clothing - no jacket (or a jacket that can easily be removed, thin wool pants (in the winter) or light-weight linen (in the summer), and absolutely no boots. Of course, this time, since I didn't know I would be weighing in, I was wearing exactly the opposite of what I should be wearing. Not a good weigh in. I could not take off my boots, but I was able to slip off my jacket. I couldn't take off my belt either. And it was evening, so add on the pounds from the day, luckily I had not had dinner yet. There also was the jewelry - a necklace, bracelet, and earrings. No wonder I weighed 5 pounds more than my bathroom scale displayed earlier that morning!

About a year ago, I bought myself a new bathroom scale. While I know Weight Watchers would not approve, I do weigh myself every morning. I'm sure I'm typical of women my age and other ages maybe too. I love my scale...it is digital with big numbers so I can see the exact weight without wearing my glasses. I always weigh myself before I get in the shower...no extra clothing pounds for me...it's au-natural. And if I don't like what I weigh the first time...I'll get off and step on the scale again...just to make sure...sometimes if it is different the second time around...I'll make a third step up...the third time always tells the truth. This scale was a good investment....some mornings it is almost like a stepper machine. It gets more use than my reclining bicycle that I spent so much money on.

I probably should not be so obsessed with weighing myself everyday...but over the years it has become a habit. Usually, Monday's are not good days...I tend to pig out on the weekend. Then I spend the rest of the week trying to lose the pounds I gained so I can gain them back all over again. Sometimes if I have a good Monday, I'll let myself have peanut butter on waffles for breakfast. If not it's another Kashi Heart to Heart cereal day to start off the week...but I do cheat with a little Captain Crunch to top it off....it is Monday after all.

I'd likely be a terrible dieter...better keep exercising!

Judi

Incredible Shrinking Feet

Why does it seem that while my hips are expanding my feet are shrinking? Gone are the days when it was simple to buy a pair of shoes. I used to be a size 8 or 7-1/2. I never had problems buying shoes. I always had a narrow foot, but now my feet are slightly smaller than a size 7-1/2 and too large for a size 7. Now I have to buy a size 7-1/2 and add two Doctor Scholl's inserts to each shoe so the size fits. I also add heel grippers to compensate for my narrow heel. Next it will be the orthopedic inserts and then I'll need to add a podiatrist to my list of doctors. Shoe shopping is not a favorite pasttime anymore...wish I was like Carrie Bradshaw from "Sex and the City" whose foot fit every pair of Manolos or Jimmy Choo...not that I could afford to buy such luxurious shoes, so I guess it's just as well that I don't have perfect feet.

While I know Easy Spirits and Naturalizer are the "mature woman's" shoe, I don't like to admit that I actually have these shoes in my closet. If I do admit this... does it mean I'm now considered a "mature woman?"

Mules...Forget about shoes with open backs...the shoes they call mules. I don't know how women walk in these shoes, let alone drive. Every time I've tried to wear a pair my feet fall out of them...I end up walking barefoot and the shoes are somewhere five steps back!

High Heels... I also can no longer wear high heels, too much pressure on the ball of my feet. Although, I did wear a pair of sandals with high heels to the wedding I recently attended. I was able to stand and walk for a few hours...very surprising...Ann Taylor to the rescue (again!)...maybe they were just the right heel height for the shape of my foot. They had stretched out a bit since I originally wore them and did require constant strap adjustments throughout the evening.

Kitten Heels...Kitten heels are about the highest I can go...love the Franco Sarto and Arturo Chiang brands. I think they were made for narrow feet.

Flats...So glad flats are back in style. They are not as sexy as heels, but way more comfortable. The Enzo brand makes my favorite brand for summer flats and are available in every color.

Patent Leather Shoes...these bring back memories of my childhood. My black patent leather Mary Janes were my favorites when I was a kid...so shiny! If you like patent leather shoes...check out the new Bloomingdales catalog or Bloomingdales.com website...there are red patent leather flats by Arturo Chiang called "Gigi" (loved that movie, maybe that's why I love the shoes)...I may have to splurge and buy these shoes.

Boots...are also not fun to shop for either. I have thin legs so most all the high top boots are too wide for my legs. I did purchase a pair of Nine West lower brown boots this year and liked them so much that I went back to the shoe store and bought the same pair in black. Now that I have wider hips and my older suit pants inch up I have to compensate with boots...that way the length of the pants don't look too short.

Maybe I'll find some neat new shoes when I go to Italy. I do love Italian shoe designers. As Michaelangelo said, "What spirit is so empty and blind, that it cannot recognize the fact that the foot is more noble than the shoe, and skin more beautiful than the garment with which it is clothed."

Judi